36 Questions to Fall in Love

The concept of falling in love is a fascinating and often elusive one. But what if there was a way to increase the chances of developing a deeper connection with someone? In 1997, psychologist Arthur Aron published a study that outlined a set of 36 questions that can lead to increased intimacy and connection between two people. In this post, we’ll explore these questions and what makes them so effective in fostering romantic feelings.

What are the 36 Questions?

The 36 questions were designed to be asked in a specific order, with each question building upon the previous one. The questions cover a range of topics, from background information to more personal and introspective topics. By the end of the 36 questions, both participants should feel a greater sense of intimacy and connection.

Why do the 36 Questions Work?

The questions work by creating a sense of vulnerability and openness between the two participants. As they answer each question, they are revealing more about themselves and allowing the other person to understand them on a deeper level. This increased self-disclosure and mutual understanding can lead to feelings of intimacy and connection.

How to Use the 36 Questions

Here are the 36 questions in order, along with a brief explanation of each one:

Given the choice of anyone in the world, whom would you want as a dinner guest?
Would you like to be famous? In what way?
Before making a telephone call, do you ever rehearse what you are going to say? Why?
What would constitute a “perfect” day for you?
When did you last sing to yourself? To someone else?
If you were able to live to the age of 90 and retain either the mind or body of a 30-year-old for the last 60 years of your life, which would you want?
Do you have a secret hunch about how you will die?
Name three things you and your partner appear to have in common.
For what in your life do you feel most grateful?
If you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be?
Take four minutes and tell your partner your life story in as much detail as possible.
If you could wake up tomorrow having gained any one quality or ability, what would it be?
If a crystal ball could tell you the truth about yourself, your life, the future or anything else, what would you want to know?
Is there something that you’ve dreamed of doing for a long time? Why haven’t you done it?
What is the greatest accomplishment of your life?
What do you value most in a friendship?
What is your most treasured memory?
What is your most terrible memory?
If you knew that in one year you would die suddenly, would you change anything about the way you are now living? Why?
What does friendship mean to you?
What roles do love and affection play in your life?
Alternate sharing something you consider a positive characteristic of your partner. Share a total of five items.
How close and warm is your family? Do you feel your childhood was happier than most other people’s?
How do you feel about your relationship with your mother?
Make three true “we” statements each. For instance, “We are both in this room feeling…”
Complete this sentence: “I wish I had someone with whom I could share…”
If you were going to become a close friend with your partner, please share what would be important for him or her to know.
Tell your partner what you like about them; be very honest this time, saying things that you might not say to someone you’ve just met.
Share with your partner an embarrassing moment in your life.
When did you last cry in front of another person? By yourself?
Tell your partner something that you like about them already.
What, if anything, is too serious to be joked about?
If you were to die this evening with no opportunity to communicate with anyone, what would you most regret not having told someone? Why haven’t you told them yet?
Your house, containing everything you own, catches fire. After saving your loved ones and pets, you have time to safely make a final dash to save any one item. What would it be? Why?
Of all the people in your family, whose death would you find most disturbing? Why?
Share a personal problem and ask your partner’s advice on how he or she might handle it. Also, ask your partner to reflect back to you how you seem to be feeling about the problem you have chosen.

Conclusion:

The 36 questions are a powerful tool for increasing intimacy and connection between two people. Whether you’re in a new relationship or looking to deepen an existing one, giving the questions a try can lead to a greater sense of understanding and closeness. Just remember to approach the questions with openness and a willingness to be vulnerable, and the results can be truly transformative.

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Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs) on 36 Questions to Fall in Love

What are the 36 questions to fall in love?

The 36 questions to fall in love are a set of questions designed to increase intimacy and connection between two people. The questions range from light and fun, to more personal and introspective. The idea is to answer the questions with a partner, and as the questions progress, they become increasingly intimate and revealing, leading to a deeper understanding and connection.

Who created the 36 questions to fall in love?

The 36 questions to fall in love were created by psychologist Arthur Aron as part of a study on increasing intimacy in close relationships. The questions have since been popularized and used by many people as a tool for building deeper connections with others.

What is the purpose of the 36 questions to fall in love?

The purpose of the 36 questions to fall in love is to increase intimacy and connection between two people. By answering the questions with a partner, you can learn more about each other, understand each other’s perspectives, and build a deeper level of trust and understanding.

Do the 36 questions really work to make two people fall in love?

The 36 questions are not a guaranteed way to make two people fall in love. However, they can increase intimacy and connection, and can be a useful tool for people looking to deepen their relationship with a partner.

How long does it take to answer the 36 questions to fall in love?

The amount of time it takes to answer the 36 questions to fall in love varies depending on how quickly you and your partner are able to answer each question. On average, it can take anywhere from 45 minutes to an hour to answer all 36 questions.

How should I approach the 36 questions to fall in love with my partner?

When approaching the 36 questions to fall in love with your partner, it’s important to approach the questions with openness and a willingness to be vulnerable. Be honest and truthful in your answers, and try to listen actively to your partner’s answers as well. The key to making the most of the 36 questions is to approach them with a positive attitude and a willingness to learn and grow together.